~ first tooth ~

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Yesterday, August 19th, Lela lost her first tooth!  

She was exactly 1 week shy of her 6 1/2 birthday.

Here she is at 7 months old, 

the moment when I first saw her tooth was poking through her gum.

I remember that sweet little tooth peaking out at me,

snapping this picture,

and am experiencing a little heartache knowing she has outgrown it.

~ first tooth! excuse daddy's leg and foot! ~

She first noticed her tooth was wiggly on June 2nd, 

her Aunt Rebecca's birthday.

(Lela's middle name is Rebecca.)

~ june 2nd - tooth begins to wiggle ~

 ~ june 2nd ~

 ~ smiling self portraits ~  

 ~ thought this was a really funny one ~

A week ago, with her tooth getting quite wiggly,

and Lela getting more brave about moving it around,

we decided to take a few more pictures.

Over the preceding few days, her tooth became quite limber in her mouth.

It would flop about of its own accord,

and she was both taking care to chew around it,

and experimenting on biting into harder items with it.

I really have bittersweet feelings over this,

more so than any other experience of motherhood so far.

First haircut.

Walking independently.

Tying her own shoes.

Weaning.

 ~ is it really gone? ~

I was completely shocked when yesterday, 

jumping between the beds,

she landed on her belly with enough force to propel her tooth out of her month,

and it landed squarely in her hand!  

She leaped up from the bed, 

in surprise, shock and excitement saying,

"My tooth came out!"

And sure enough, there it was,

tiny, white and perfect,

in her small palm

as her lips and tongue worked over her teeth and newly exposed socket. 

She ran to the bathroom to look, giddy,

poking her tongue through the hole, 

tasting the little bit of blood in her mouth,

now and then looking up at us in wonderment and delight.

And pride.

 ~ rite of passage ~

When she started to get nervous a few weeks ago,

I told her about how much fun it would be to suck on a straw through the gap.

So after her initial investigation, 

she rushed downstairs, climbed on the counter and dug through the cabinets for a straw.

I was waiting for her with a little cup of water,

and we went outside 

(for better light for pictures, and because the weather was nice).

Somewhat ironically,

we decided to go out for ice cream after supper,

to celebrate the milestone of losing the first tooth.

That night, she snuggled up in her own bed, 

tired and only a little excited for a visit from the tooth faery.

She didn't really know what it entailed,

but was still floating in the clouds with the excitement of that new gap in her mouth.

I made her a tiny pillow stuffed with wool and lavender,

using linen remnants from Spring Equinox baskets,

embroidered with her name in blue, one of her favorite colors,

with crystals and purple bursts representing her color from babyhood.

On the reverse was a small wool pocket,

made of the same felt as the first birthday crown she had,

and embellished with a tiny pearlized bead for her first tooth.

She tucked her tiny little tooth into the pocket and fastened the button.

Then she nestled it under her pillow,

and was soon fast asleep

(possibly from the soporific ice cream treat).

The next morning, she awoke slowly, 

and she snuggled me in her bed gently and affectionately,

really enjoying the connection.

It was quite a while before she remembered

"The Tooth Faery!" 

and burrowed her hand under the pillow to pull out her little pocket.

Secured under the flap was a necklace, and inside the tiny pocket was a beautiful rose quartz crystal.

She didn't say much, just scrambled to put on the necklace, and admire it in the mirror.

Delicate purple faceted crystals are surrounded by tiny glass and sterling beads,

with a sterling butterfly pendant.

As I mentioned before, purple was the color we chose for her as a baby,

and the butterfly is her symbol.  

The Tooth Faery was very generous and clearly knew much about my little girl!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have had a difficult time understanding the connection that Waldorf philosophy places

between loss of primary teeth and readiness for academic learning in first grade.

I just didn't grasp that a purely physiological event (tooth loss) 

could have any relationship to the emotional and mental place

a child must be before she or he can move into the 'academic' world.

(Please see this lovely post on the Magic Onions about this very topic!  

But the more I read and learn about yoga,

the more I understand that the body, the mind, the heart and the spirit 

are connected.....and strive to be connected.

Over the past couple weeks, 

I've watched Lela soften, relax into the world a little,

and connect more to me than she has in the last couple years.

I have been worrying about her a lot, as I have discussed with friends at length,

and afraid that I had somehow 'ruined' her by giving her 2 siblings at the same time, 

when she was just a baby herself.

That in my difficult few years with depression, anxiety and panic attacks,

that I didn't make the connection and bond with her that I should have.

In my mind, guilt is the worst emotion we can experience.

If you let it, it can have the power to undermine the very situation you are worried over.

As I let go of that guilt, 

sometimes it goes easily, 

sometimes it goes kicking and screaming,

I'm watching her blossom in subtle ways,

watching her become an active participant in our family,

and not just a bystander joining in.

Perhaps, after all, the tooth is an outward sign of an inward process.  

I'm blessed and grateful to be guardian of this fine person,

and witness her move into the world and find her own way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for taking the time to read this!

If anyone has any words of wisdom to share on tooth loss,

the 7-year change, growing as a mother, 

or anything else to share, 

please know that I welcome it.

~carrie~