~ first tooth ~

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Yesterday, August 19th, Lela lost her first tooth!  

She was exactly 1 week shy of her 6 1/2 birthday.

Here she is at 7 months old, 

the moment when I first saw her tooth was poking through her gum.

I remember that sweet little tooth peaking out at me,

snapping this picture,

and am experiencing a little heartache knowing she has outgrown it.

~ first tooth! excuse daddy's leg and foot! ~

She first noticed her tooth was wiggly on June 2nd, 

her Aunt Rebecca's birthday.

(Lela's middle name is Rebecca.)

~ june 2nd - tooth begins to wiggle ~

 ~ june 2nd ~

 ~ smiling self portraits ~  

 ~ thought this was a really funny one ~

A week ago, with her tooth getting quite wiggly,

and Lela getting more brave about moving it around,

we decided to take a few more pictures.

Over the preceding few days, her tooth became quite limber in her mouth.

It would flop about of its own accord,

and she was both taking care to chew around it,

and experimenting on biting into harder items with it.

I really have bittersweet feelings over this,

more so than any other experience of motherhood so far.

First haircut.

Walking independently.

Tying her own shoes.

Weaning.

 ~ is it really gone? ~

I was completely shocked when yesterday, 

jumping between the beds,

she landed on her belly with enough force to propel her tooth out of her month,

and it landed squarely in her hand!  

She leaped up from the bed, 

in surprise, shock and excitement saying,

"My tooth came out!"

And sure enough, there it was,

tiny, white and perfect,

in her small palm

as her lips and tongue worked over her teeth and newly exposed socket. 

She ran to the bathroom to look, giddy,

poking her tongue through the hole, 

tasting the little bit of blood in her mouth,

now and then looking up at us in wonderment and delight.

And pride.

 ~ rite of passage ~

When she started to get nervous a few weeks ago,

I told her about how much fun it would be to suck on a straw through the gap.

So after her initial investigation, 

she rushed downstairs, climbed on the counter and dug through the cabinets for a straw.

I was waiting for her with a little cup of water,

and we went outside 

(for better light for pictures, and because the weather was nice).

Somewhat ironically,

we decided to go out for ice cream after supper,

to celebrate the milestone of losing the first tooth.

That night, she snuggled up in her own bed, 

tired and only a little excited for a visit from the tooth faery.

She didn't really know what it entailed,

but was still floating in the clouds with the excitement of that new gap in her mouth.

I made her a tiny pillow stuffed with wool and lavender,

using linen remnants from Spring Equinox baskets,

embroidered with her name in blue, one of her favorite colors,

with crystals and purple bursts representing her color from babyhood.

On the reverse was a small wool pocket,

made of the same felt as the first birthday crown she had,

and embellished with a tiny pearlized bead for her first tooth.

She tucked her tiny little tooth into the pocket and fastened the button.

Then she nestled it under her pillow,

and was soon fast asleep

(possibly from the soporific ice cream treat).

The next morning, she awoke slowly, 

and she snuggled me in her bed gently and affectionately,

really enjoying the connection.

It was quite a while before she remembered

"The Tooth Faery!" 

and burrowed her hand under the pillow to pull out her little pocket.

Secured under the flap was a necklace, and inside the tiny pocket was a beautiful rose quartz crystal.

She didn't say much, just scrambled to put on the necklace, and admire it in the mirror.

Delicate purple faceted crystals are surrounded by tiny glass and sterling beads,

with a sterling butterfly pendant.

As I mentioned before, purple was the color we chose for her as a baby,

and the butterfly is her symbol.  

The Tooth Faery was very generous and clearly knew much about my little girl!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I have had a difficult time understanding the connection that Waldorf philosophy places

between loss of primary teeth and readiness for academic learning in first grade.

I just didn't grasp that a purely physiological event (tooth loss) 

could have any relationship to the emotional and mental place

a child must be before she or he can move into the 'academic' world.

(Please see this lovely post on the Magic Onions about this very topic!  

But the more I read and learn about yoga,

the more I understand that the body, the mind, the heart and the spirit 

are connected.....and strive to be connected.

Over the past couple weeks, 

I've watched Lela soften, relax into the world a little,

and connect more to me than she has in the last couple years.

I have been worrying about her a lot, as I have discussed with friends at length,

and afraid that I had somehow 'ruined' her by giving her 2 siblings at the same time, 

when she was just a baby herself.

That in my difficult few years with depression, anxiety and panic attacks,

that I didn't make the connection and bond with her that I should have.

In my mind, guilt is the worst emotion we can experience.

If you let it, it can have the power to undermine the very situation you are worried over.

As I let go of that guilt, 

sometimes it goes easily, 

sometimes it goes kicking and screaming,

I'm watching her blossom in subtle ways,

watching her become an active participant in our family,

and not just a bystander joining in.

Perhaps, after all, the tooth is an outward sign of an inward process.  

I'm blessed and grateful to be guardian of this fine person,

and witness her move into the world and find her own way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for taking the time to read this!

If anyone has any words of wisdom to share on tooth loss,

the 7-year change, growing as a mother, 

or anything else to share, 

please know that I welcome it.

~carrie~

~ where the moss droops down ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The end of July/beginning of August found our family camping

on the Chesapeake Bay, at First Landing State Park.

Formerly named Seashore State Park,

it was renamed to reflect it being the location where European explorers arrived first.

The set foot on the sand beaches, braced by wild, forested dunes.

(Parts of The New World movie with Colin Farrell were filmed here.

My underwhelmingly-impressed spouse declined the invitation to meet him.)

We swam in the beautiful, calm waters of the bay, 

as you can see in this post,

but we also visited the incredible freshwater cypress swamp.

 ~ bald cypress and spanish moss growing at their most northerly latitudes ~

 ~ freshwater swamps provided water for native peoples and european explorers alike ~

 ~ looking like tree stumps, worn by time or perhaps beavers, bald cypress 'knees' are part of the root system and provide stability for the tree, and important habitat for other plants and animals ~

 ~ bald cypress trail in the park has many boardwalks ~

 ~ spanish moss hangs abundantly and gracefully from the bald cypress trees ~

 ~ ephiphytic spanish moss is actually in the bromeliad family ~

 ~ from personal experience, i can tell you not to play with spanish moss, or risk chiggers ~

 ~ i loved the beautiful roots of this beech tree, reaching out from the side of the forested dune ~

 ~ delicate and beautiful cranefly orchid ~

 ~ one of many deleterious side trails in the park, we encouraged the children to *not* explore for fear of damaging this rare habitat ~

It was so special to be able to share this place with the girls.

I am always in awe of such a wild and primitive place,

just minutes away from the busy resort area of Virginia Beach.

I'm so grateful for the protection of state parks and nature preserves.

~carrie~

~ what rhythm? bedtime ~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Once again, I'm joining Nicole from Frontier Dreams 

to share a little bit about the rhythm in our home.

Last week, I believe I had what is called a 'pity party'

regarding our rhythm/lack of rhythm as viewed by my perfectionist-yet-anxious side.

So this week, I really looked at the details of our life

for the places where we have rituals that have slowly become rhythm.

Today, I'm sharing a little bit of our bedtime rhythm

which has slowly emerged into something beautiful and peaceful.

And since I don't have any pictures of bedtime now, 

I'm sharing a few pictures of the girls when they were small.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bedtime usually starts as we finish supper.

The girls take their plates to the counter,

and play a little, inside or out, depending on the weather and season.

During the Autumn and Winter, it is front of the fire.

During the Spring and Summer, they may be outside.

~ who gives bathtub crayons to a not-yet-2-year-old? ~

We start bedtime as I begin singing
Moon, Moon, Moon by Laurie Berkner.

We all make our way upstairs, more or less.

Sometimes they are pleasant and peaceful during this transition,

sometimes they are dragging their feet (literally) 

and looking for an excuse to stay downstairs.

"Where's my kitty?" 

"I forgot to water the plants!"

"Just one more firefly, please."

~ 2-year old lela ~

They undress and put their clothes (which are almost certainly dirty) in the hamper,

and take their turns going to the bathroom.

Depending on their level of dirtiness, they may take a bath or shower.

(If they need one, bedtime starts earlier.)

Then we play "The Toothbrush Game"

where I say "I'm thinking of a number better 1 and 5, what's your guess?"

and whoever guesses it correctly, brushes their teeth.

The bathroom is small and a little cramped, so it's not feasible to have all three at the sink at once.

~ liv and laurel (7 months) and lela (2 years)

Then they all go into the bedroom they share

where I have (usually) laid out their pajamas.

Sometimes it is so hot that they sleep naked, though.

If they didn't take a bath, I will give them each a sponge bath at this point.

I will finish with a little round of toe games.

We do This Little Pig Went to Market, 

our own version:

This little pig went to market,

this little pig stayed home,

this little pig had tofu,

and this little pig had none.

And this little pig.....

he cried.....

weeeweeeweeeweee, all the way home. (I run my fingers up their leg)

We also do this one:

This little pig had a rub-a-dub.

This little pig had a scrub-a-scrub.

This little pig-a-wig ran upstairs,

and this little pig-a-wig called out 'bears!"

Down came the jar with a loud slim-slam,

and this little pig had all the jam.

~ liv and laurel ~

~ liv, laurel, lela and daddy reading ~

Then Daddy (weekdays) or Momma (weekends and days where Daddy works late)

will read to them, snuggled between Laurel and Liv.

They start off the night (ahem) sleeping crossways in a full-sized bed.

Where they wake up is anyone's guess......

We read them a story - we have 5 or 6 books that they can choose from.

And then turn off the lights and lie back down with them. 

~ often, daddy or momma falls asleep with the girls ~

If I'm putting them to sleep, I will sing Kumbaya, very slowly,

while massaging and tickling their backs in turns.

If they're having trouble sleeping, I sing more verses.

Or if they're really having trouble, before I sing I will tell them about their day.

If Daddy is putting them to sleep,

he usually sings some Grateful Dead song,

and lies back down with them and falls asleep....I come and wake him up. :D

~ nursing livvy to sleep, while laurel sucks her fingers and twirls my hair ~

It wasn't always this way.

When Lela was a tiny baby, I nursed her to sleep, then settled her in the crib,

where she remained until she woke up and came into our bed.

Then she moved to our bed exclusively.

When her twin sisters came along, 

it wasn't practical for me to nurse her to sleep anymore.

I would nurse the two of them until they fell asleep,

and read or sing to Lela until she feel asleep,

curled up by my head on the pillows, and twirling my hair.

This continued until she was 4 and the little ones were 2, 

when they didn't just drift off into a milky dreamland.

So over the course of a few months, I nightweaned them,

and in a few more months, we had transitioned them to their own room,

just a few steps away from our room.

They go to sleep in there, but by 1am, at least one (usually Olivia) is in our bed.

Lela often follows in an hour or so, at which point our queen bed is very crowded,

and Mike or I flee the bed of kicking feet and flailing arms to the guest room.

We need to work on this part of the day (errr, night) so that everyone gets enough rest.

And.....sometimes when they were little,

bedtime was a walk around the block, 

with me looking like this.........

~ for you babywearing folks, a gypsymama and a kozy ~

~ carrie ~